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Jan 07 2014

How long would you last in an apocalypse?

This year, I rang in the New Year quietly at home with my husband, enjoying some pizza, a bottle of wine and AMC’s The Walking Dead marathon.

I have a mild obsession with the show, which actually sparked me to watch World War Z not long ago. In case you haven’t seen it, World War Z is similar to Walking Dead in that its story revolves around zombies taking over what’s left of the world. Except the movie’s super zombies with their ridiculous speed and power would probably kick Walking Dead’s slow-moving zombies’ asses.

Simply put: Walking Dead keeps me at the edge of my seat. World War Z kept me awake at night.

zombie apocalypse quote

When I first started watching the show, I thought the idea of zombies was ridiculous, yet I was so interested that I continued watching. It wasn’t long before I got so lost in the show that I started to wonder…

“Maybe this COULD happen one day.”

What started as funny hypothetical scenarios like asking Craig, “What would we do if zombies took over the world?” turned into serious, “Let’s learn to use guns just in case!” paranoia as I got more and more addicted to the show.

Then when I watched World War Z, my learn-to-use-guns strategy turned into a defeated “Find a corner, get right with God, and wait for death” conclusion.

zombiesAll this to ask…

How long do you think you’d last in a zombie apocalypse?

Me… probably not very long. If the “outbreak” starts in another country, maybe a couple of weeks. But if domestic, I’d give myself a few days max. And that’s me being generous.

Okay, let’s move on to something a little more realistic.

What about natural disasters? How prepared are you?

Last year, the world saw several natural disasters that shocked everyone and racked up unthinkable death tolls. It was sad to watch the news and see what was happening in the world.

In our little Toronto / GTA world, we’ve seen the city get hit with a rain storm in the summer that flooded parts of the GTA, left people and cars stranded, and knocked out power for several hours.

That event made me realize a couple of things:

  1. I find it nearly impossible to drag my out-of-shape body up 24 flights of stairs when my condo elevator is down.
  2. With no candles or working flashlights in the house, I am SO unprepared for such power outages.

Then a few days before Christmas, Toronto was hit with an ice storm that caused trees to fall onto cars, made roads nearly impossible to drive on, and knocked out power for several DAYS.

Since then, we’ve had horrifically cold weather so much so that last week, we had what the news called “ice quakes”… where water in the ground expands during extreme cold temperatures resulting in loud bangs.

(What the hell? Is this a new thing?)

I came into work and people started talking about “the end of the world” saying that “the apocalypse was approaching” (obviously an exaggeration of the recent environmental effects).

But let’s say for a moment that the end of the world WAS approaching.

How prepared are you? How long would you last?

It’s sad to admit that I’d be useless in the event of an apocalypse. Whether it’s zombies eating my face off, freezing to death in the next ice storm, or simply collapsing in the stairwell on my way up 24 flights… I’m pretty well hopeless.

What about you?

2 comments

  1. Jack

    The one thing I have learnt from all these apocalypse films is…if it all starts kicking off, the last place you want to end up is trapped in a mall…it just never works out for the best!

    1. Joanne

      lol totally! Everyone would probably get trampled on being stuck in a mall during a zombie attack. But at least you can escape, if you’re fast enough and close to the exit. Imagine being stuck on an airplane? Like in World War Z. It’d be over.

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