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Oct 20 2013

Me travelling alone = Giant clusterfuck

clusterfuck quotes, quotes about clusterfuck disasters,Most people can travel alone, no problem. For me, travelling alone turns into a giant clusterfuck.

Whether it was for business or pleasure, I’ve never travelled alone. In fact, I hardly travelled at all until I started working and travelled for business. But even then, I was never alone.

  • I always went to the airport with someone
  • I always shared a hotel room with someone
  • And I always flew home with someone

When it comes to personal travel, my husband usually takes care of all the details, so I never have to worry about a thing.

But a few weeks ago, my company caught me by surprise when they told me on Monday that I would need to travel to Cancun/Riviera Maya on Saturday. By myself.

I was okay getting to the airport, going through security and flying. It was when I landed that everything went to shit.

Disaster 1 – I almost flooded my bathroom

Every time I stay in a hotel room that has a hydro-massage tub, I always fill the tub, turn on the jets and soak my feet. But because I’m basically blind without my glasses or contacts I turned on the jets too soon (thinking the tub was full enough). And the air pressure blew the water LITERALLY everywhere!

The edge of the tub, the floor, my towels were soaking wet. I tried to turn off the jets but the button was stuck. So it took a good 10 minutes of chaotic water gushing before I finally got the jets to turn off.

hot mess quote, quote about hot mess, disaster quote, quotes about disastersDisaster 2 – I almost flooded my bathroom AGAIN

When I got that situation under control, I let the tub fill up “completely” before turning the jets back on. It took awhile, so I connected to the WiFi and started checking emails. Next thing you know, I was “in the zone” working.

Suddenly I remembered, “OMG! I left the water running!!” I ran to the bathroom and the tub had overflowed. Not by much, but enough that I had to use everything I could find to soak up the water. At that point, I gave up on the tub and took a shower.

Disaster 3 – I missed my pill 3 days in a row

Craig gave me his waterproof watch, which was set to Cancun time and had an alarm reminding me to take my anti-baby pill every day. Did I use it? No. Did I have a good reason not to? Not really.

Evidently, I missed my pill 3 days in a row. I remember reading that if you miss a pill, you’re supposed to take it as soon as you remember. So I popped them all like Tic Tacs. I learned later that “apparently” you’re not supposed to take that many all at once. (Maybe THAT’S why I was so emotional all week!)

Disaster 4 – I never knew what time it was

During my 4-day trip, I had 4 devices to tell time.

  1. My phone, which automatically changed to Cancun time
  2. My laptop, which always read Toronto time
  3. My personal watch, which stayed on Toronto time
  4. The waterproof watch my husband gave me, which was set to Cancun time

Because there were so many different devices telling me the time, I just couldn’t keep track of what was what. Randomly throughout the day, I’d Skype Craig and ask him, “What time is it in Cancun right now?”

He’d be like, “You’re IN Cancun!”

Despite my inability to tell time, luckily I didn’t miss any meetings, conference calls to Toronto, or dinner plans.

BUT… I nearly missed my transfer to the airport (Disaster 5)

The day I flew home had to be the day my time confusion would bite me in the ass. I was so confused about the time that I was a half hour late for my transfer. When they called my room looking for me was when I realized what happened. So I rushed out as fast as I could.

Disaster 6 – I went the wrong way and got lost!

I was so frazzled that I stepped out of my room and started going the wrong way by accident. (I stayed at the Grand Sunset Princess, which is A) gigantic and B) has 2 separate sections that literally mirror each other.)

When I realized I was going in the wrong direction and started heading in the right direction, I ended up going to the wrong lobby! (The resort has 2 lobbies, which were about 10 minutes apart from each other.) I finally showed up for my transfer… Very late… And a hot sweaty mess.

I want to thank all the people who’ve ever had to travel with me

I really underestimate how much those who’ve had to travel with me (whether it was for business or pleasure) look out for me. In most cases, I probably wouldn’t make it back to Canada alive without them.

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