Writing my wedding vows was the one detail I left till the last minute. I just assumed the writer in me would kick in and the perfect words would spill out the moment I sat down to write them.
Wrong. So very wrong.
When I tried writing my wedding vows on my phone a couple of weeks before we left, I drew a blank. So I put it away and tried again later. Later when I sat in front of my laptop to write my vows, I ended up writing a blog post about our elopement announcement instead.
A pattern was starting to develop here.
The day before our flight to Costa Rica, I kicked it old school with a pen and paper. I jotted down a couple of lines and then hit a wall. I didn’t understand why writing wedding vows was such a difficult task. I do love the guy, and I definitely planned to be with him forever.
So why couldn’t I just write some freakin’ vows, damn it?
I started wondering, what’s the true meaning of vows?
I browsed online for an answer and learned that wedding vows are solemn promises between couples – a covenant, a declaration, and a commitment you make to someone.
Whoa… I wasn’t just writing a speech here. I was writing a covenant to somebody, a list of promises that I would keep for the rest of my life. Realistically, I already knew that, but when it came time to actually write them, it all became very real.
Since I used to fear and avoid commitment like I did pap tests, becoming engaged and common-lawed were huge steps for me. With the right person, the fear seemed to go away. But now the task of writing a set of life-long promises was the next big hurdle. And no matter how many times I tried, I kept drawing a blank.
Yes, from the dark and twisted place inside.
After talking to one of two friends who knew about our elopement, I realized that I was panicking for no reason. I knew that I loved Craig and would be with him forever – legally married or not. I guess I was trying too hard to make my wedding vows “normal” – unnecessarily.
My friend said it perfectly, “Your wedding, your vows, your way.” Since we were doing the wedding our way, why not write our vows our way?
So below are my wedding vows… my real wedding vows (no joke).
Trying to find a fancy way to say “I’ll love you forever” was really hard and probably why I procrastinated so much with my vows. So I’m just going to throw fanciness out the window and just be myself.
Our first kiss was during the Human Centipede. We celebrated our anniversary by watching the Human Centipede 2. And when you proposed, I said no before I said yes. The fact that you still love me so unconditionally in spite of me shows that you really are one of a kind.
And for all these reasons plus so much more, I’m 100% certain spending the rest of my life with you is the best decision I could ever make. I love you more than words can express. You’re the best thing that’s ever happened to me. And I promise to love you and be faithful to you for the rest of our lives. I know we’ll enjoy a long and happy life together full of goofiness and laughter.
So “my vows,” which I was struggling to write, are simply to love you forever and show you every day until you’re 78 – I mean, till death do us part.
I will forever be known to our best friends, the wedding coordinators and the Costa Rican officiant who married us… as the girl who mentioned “The Human Centipede” in her wedding vows.